Make love to me without touching me.
I see the intent In your eyes and I can tell I am fighting a war I have little to no chance of winning. You tell me to stop looking at you with such sharpness and I pull back.
“Something about your eyes,” you whisper in my ear. “I feel like you are sizing me up. Like I have wronged you in some way, and yet I don’t want you to stop. I cannot look away, no matter how hard I try.”
I say nothing. I have no answers and I don’t trust my voice at this moment. The emotions are strong with you. Your eyes tell a story, your full lips are driving me insane with all kinds of imagination and yet, I still say nothing. Because how do I explain the turmoil in me? How do I tell you how I truly feel about you? You take my hand in yours and place it on your thigh. Your palm is soft to the touch and I can tell you are nervous because I can feel you trembling.
It’s new love, full of promise, full of desire, driving the both of us insane with lust. New love is dangerous. Dangerous In the way it knocks you off your feet when you least expect, blinds you with infatuation while creating this picture in your head of happiness and carefree abandon. How it Creeps on you without realising and before you know it this person is constantly on your mind. New love is beautiful but childish and even though you know it will come to an end you do not care, because to you this person is perfect and can do no wrong. Even though – once again – you know that that cannot be true.
I want to say the words but I cannot bring myself to. So we look at each other, contemplating and scheming while asking ourselves all these questions that have no answers.
“Babe,” you start to speak but I softly put a finger to your lips and shake my head. I know what you want to say and I cannot allow you to. We both know that what we say won’t matter because at this moment we are being driven by passion and lust. My parts are on fire and I can tell that you are dying too. Anything that comes out of your mouth at this moment can’t be real. We have both been in these situations before where we ended up saying words we never meant…promises we knew we could never keep. The fear grounds us…fear of the unknown, of the impending heartbreak we both know would be inevitable. Which is ironic because this same fear drives us to do what we shouldn’t be doing in the first place. This fear of the unknown excites us and strokes our fire to greater heights. Fear of the unknown is mystical and I love mysteries. I love dangerous forbidden situations and this tops the list.
You reach out to kiss me and I open up to you. Gently at first as the tempo increases to a demanding crescendo. I love the want and need that has been building up in you, building up in the both of us. This…..this was bound to happen one way or the other. We brush the dark thoughts away, the negative thoughts that none of us wants to address. What about her and him? What about them..the hurt we will without a doubt inflict on them with our actions. I hesitate for a minute as the guilt ravages my soul but you pull me in and your masculine scent chases away whatever doubt that was beginning to form in my mind. I love how you smell and at this moment that is all that matters. We will worry about them later…later, we will gauge if the high was worth the pain.
