Love Truly Is For The Birds

On a scale of 1-10, how overated is love?

Oscar Wilde once famously said, “the heart was meant to be broken.” But was it really? Was the heart meant to be broken?

When an emotional pain surpasses a physical one and you end up equating mental anguish to pain that can only be compared to broken ribs…then, Mr Oscar, I am sorry but I don’t think I agree with your sentiments that the heart was meant to be broken. I say broken ribs because having a heartbreak is like having broken ribs, none visible but the pain is unbearable with every breathe you take.

So unbearable infact, that you wake up one night gasping for air while whispering desperately, “I can’t breathe.”

Did we mean so little to each other? All the promises, all the late nights, all that laughter….every single emotion we stirred in each other, was it all a lie? Was it a facade that came tumbling down at the slightest sign of trouble? How could someone you considered a soulmate, someone you truly thought was the one, wake up and walk away so easily, without putting in even the bare minimum effort? Whatever happened to promising to fight with our last breaths? How did we give up so easily…tell me, did we mean so little to each other?

Where is the love that we professed to each other numerous times in a day? Whatever happened to all those promises we made every night to never disappoint one another? Whatever happened to the promises we made to always chase after our happiness at any and all costs? Or did happiness suddenly become so trivial, so in consequential a matter that we find ourselves no longer interested in pursuing it?

Did we mean so little to each other?

When you feel the pain in your heart, pain so deep it feels like a physical wound and nothing else matters…. even though the feeling becomes more fleeting with every minute that passes by, when it hits it hits hard and at that point you realise, it’s not the broken heart that kills but broken pride. Nothing else matters as you go through the scenarios in your head. The lies, all the promises that ended up being broken in the blink of an eye….all the promises that ended up meaning nothing when you were both pushed to the wall. Discarded at the slightest smell of trouble, abandoned and thrown to the dogs for all they were worth. The hurtful words that were exchanged plus the things we both said that none of us meant, and all of it for what really? Looking back you can’t help but ask, what could we have done differently? Is the regret too much….or is it good riddance to bad rubbish, even though we never personally did anything to hurt each other and circumstances got us to where we currently are?

Will we one day look back at everything with fond memories, and smile at the silly things we said and the even sillier things we did to make each other happy? Will we remember the jokes fondly or frown at everything because when the moment of truth dawned on us, nothing we ever said or did mattered anymore?

The way our faces always lit up at the incoming calls or the beautiful words we always wrote to each other at least thrice a day….or did that never count for anything? The pride is too much….I have been called proud, been called a cold human being….like I don’t have feelings. But with you I hurt, and the pain is excessive, even though I guess you will never fully know the extent.

At the end of the day we move swiftly, lift our heads and act like none of it mattered…even though, at the back of our heads we still wonder if the high really was worth the pain.