“We all die. The goal isn’t to live forever, but to create something that will.” – Chuck Palahniuk
For a people that believe in life after death, Africans sure are afraid of death. They live with reckless abandon and in a manner that portrays their lack of doubt that the next day is guaranteed. Death is talked of in hush tones and – you might find this hard to believe – almost every African lives as if they are immortal.
It’s only in this part of the world where a wealthy man’s death is a sure recipe for disaster as the family squabbles and fights ascend to treacherous levels, all because the deceased never left behind a will. Africans are not in the business of writing wills…because, *drum roll* they perceive themselves to be immortal.
While alive they never could wrap their minds around their own death happening. It’s an alien concept to them. We behave like death is a novelty that happens in lands far away from us.
You would think that people would learn from those that went before them and put their houses in order before they pass on but no, Africans will bury their heads in the sand when it comes to such matters. A taboo subject that must be swept under the carpet.
I don’t know where I am going with this topic hehe. I am only writing this article because I came across a video of Musician akothee talking about her recently purchased wedding gown that cost her almost ksh 700,000. It wasn’t the price tag that caught my attention however, but her saying that buying the gown is a good decision on her part because it will be one less expense to her family when she dies. That the said wedding gown will also double up as her funeral dress. I’m not sure how many people caught on that. It startled me abit and I couldn’t help asking myself why. Why was i startled? Until it dawned on me it is because we never talk about death in such a casual manner.
Which is absurd, considering the high mortality rate in this continent.
It is because of this very reason that Martin shikuku raised eyebrows not just in the country but the whole world when he bought a coffin and dug a grave for where he would be buried when he finally kicks the bucket. Or bites the dust. ( I have absolutely no reason for using these idioms, other than the fact that it felt good using them)
Everyone thought shikuku had gone mad. Excuse us? No sane African could fathom his reasons for doing that. Must be bewitched, people murmured loudly. It got worse. In even louder undertones, everyone opined that since he had dug his own grave then he definitely was going to die soon.
He is calling on death! The experts on such matters said gravely.
“Remember the guy that sang that song about kifo?” My uncle in the village told us, a curious scared lot as we listened in disbelief, almost in fear. “Well, he died less than six months later. You cannot do that. You cannot call on death like that.”
Shikuku lived more than 10 years after that attention grabbing stint. I stand to be corrected though, it could be less than ten years. Bottom line is that he lived for years after that and didn’t die in days months as the naysayers had predicted. The cherry on top of the cake? His wishes to be buried in a coffin he bought himself and In a grave he dug himself were granted.
We need to stop living in fear of death and prepare for it as the passage of rite it actually is.
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat and asking yourself what would happen to the people you love when you eventually die? I have unfortunately, and the thought of my daughter growing up without me in this scary, ruthless world shakes me to the core. What to do? You come to the realisation that nothing much will happen. Life will move on, as it always has.
At the end of the day, everybody dies.
“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.” – Dr. Seuss
